Notes from the Twilight of the Empire
Sunday
Worked on my taxes, all the while wondering if I should wait and see whether the IRS still exists in a few months. Updated my resume for the first time in over two years. Then I’ll just need a personal statement to apply to the certificate program I’ve been looking at, although I’m still not sure exactly which concentration I want.
Monday
Several of my propagated houseplants are not thriving, and I begin to suspect it is the soil I bought on Amazon. I am more resolved than ever to be done with them.
J decided to take his chainsaw to some tree branches choking one of our myrtle trees–during the staff meeting I was leading. Thank goodness for Teams’ background noise reduction feature.
Tuesday
A hawk lands in our backyard and lingers around something I can’t quite see. I brace myself to find remains of some sort–and when I venture out to look it is only some leaves from the tree J cut the day before.
Wednesday
I decide to read up on Solidarność and pull out this book I bought at a library sale in Burlington, MA. I had it displayed in my office at U-M for years because we had invited Michael Dobbs to give a talk. And because my former boss knew Lech . Dobbs’ One Minute to Midnight is also excellent but I don’t own a copy.
Thursday
For date night, I choose a Turkish place I’ve seen good reviews of. They include a serving of french fries in addition to a heaping helping of rice on the platters. And a half a pita. Not low carb. And rather pricey. We are the only customers at 5 pm.
We walk around downtown, past some other options that probably also wouldn’t have been keto-friendly. And some empty storefronts.
Friday
I reviewed Katherine Center’s new book for NetGalley. She’s become one of my favorite contemporary authors. There’s such a value judgement around “chick lit” or romance, but what other fiction actually centers (no pun intended) women’s inner lives or desires? I’ve read so many cringey female characters in more respected literature.
Saturday
Took a walk at Boone’s Cave. I laughed when I saw the (threatening) message on this (creepy white) van.
But then the driver pulled around and I was much more disturbed. The family appeared to be some sort of religious extremists, that unfair dynamic where the men just have a beard but dress basically normally and the women and girls are in plain blue old-timey dresses and head coverings. And I know that’s a tactic to further the isolation of the women, that by rejecting them or treating them as odd we outsiders reinforce the narrative that the outside world is bad and scary, but it’s so hard to smile and act friendly in the face of clear oppression. I guess I need to keep reading about Wałęsa.
The wooden boardwalks and stairs at the park are really starting to fall into disrepair. They’ve even put some kind of metal brace inside the cave. It’s been a fixture of my time in this area, but I know I will have a last time in this place, a last time on these steps, a last moment in this part of the country. There are some people here I’ve probably already seen for the last time. And that’s why these notes are an attempt to be a little more present in every moment.